Perpetually Perplexed

How many times of the year will be sales in various shops announced? Does it mean the shop keepers are so desperate to sell their wares or they are being philanthropic ? They keep telling us, save money by shopping with them. That will be possible only if we do not spend money. Does it mean that, in their shop, they let you shop free of cost? Now consider these buy one and get one free. Sometimes it is buy 2 get 1 free and so on in different combinations. I am waiting for the day when they say buy 0 get 1 free. That will be real saving. Isn't it? And let us look at the combination of buy item and free item. You buy a laptop, you get a printer free. You buy a cooker and get a non-stick set free. But today's paper said microwave oven free, if you buy a laptop. Obviously it is for people like me. Dump something in the microwave so that people at home will have something to eat when you happily blog and surf. I am asking the great supermarkets, why are you not giving 1kg ric...

what is this zazen. I feel at least that will give me some peace. That is it will let me kill the time. Realizing that I am not getting adjusted to this world. hey, I belong to another world. where people do not hate me :-( The office is terrible Last few days of it. Other job prospects are terrible. I saw that I am mentioning 10 years of experience in my cv. But I finished my graduation 22 years ago. Where did my other 12 years go? Where did I lose them. Now you know I am here. I have not only lost my hope too often, passwords too often, sim codes too often but I have also lost my precious 12 years.

I read this book my Toni Morrison. I am unable to come out of its tragedy. A woman who was a slave and has escaped from slavery will kill her 2 year old baby girl when she was about to be caught again. She is haunted by the ghost of that child. She loves her children so fiercely that to save them from this horrible world, she plans to send them to a place where they can not harm her. If we are so cruel to fellow human beings, can we ever call ourselves human?

I seriously believe that I am wired differently atleast. Unlike other people of my species, I am not obsessed with my looks, I am not jeoulous of other women who look younger or prettier. I praise them, that too behind them. I rarely look into the mirror. I did not look into the mirror even when I was younger. I feel jealous when I see another person more intelligent ?? I like to read serious fiction. I like to watch films which do win awards. Not only that. I do not like to cook. My creativity will be anywhere but in the kitchen. In fact, if my life were like my kitchen, god help my life. I am not disciplined.

Or is it? How important are the names in our lives? You observe the names of shops in any road in Bangalore. Sanskrit(normally gods' names) and English names are in the ratio 50:50 or even 40:60.  Like Nanjundeshwara stores, Lucky book stores etc.  What about our names? Names of humans?  Most of our names are Sanskrit words with beautiful meanings and many a time not at all related to who we are. My name usha means morning and I never get up in morning. We see Shanta (Calm) who shouts at her children and spouse 24 by 7.  We also see Sundar (Beautiful ) who will not be so sundar. In our district Karwar, many of the names will be those of Lord Ganesha. Like Ganesha, Gajanana, Vinayaka, Ganapathi. Every house will have them. My uncle is Gajanana, my cousin is Vinayaka, two of my husband's nephews are Ganapati's, my husband's niece's husband is Vinayaka, my brother in law is Vinayaka. Next to him, comes the name Mahabaleshwar. My grandapa's name is Mahabale...

Had been to a program called ashtavadhana today. In kannada as far as I have seen only R.Ganesh performs it. See the link here. Can we say it is height of multitasking? By earthly human beings. Good thing was so many people had come. Well, good because it shows we Bangaloreans are interested in other things than TV also. One toddler was restless. Appa, I can not see. It was complaining. Dad told, there is nothing to see here. Then why are we here. child asks. Many of us are like that child. We need to see everything. We do not exercise any of our other sensory organs.

I think I am past the stage where I need dummies guide to computers and associated things. But what I badly need is dummy's guide to living a mature, disciplined and planned life without living without any aim facing each day as it comes. At the same time not feeling too down and depressed. Then I remembered, the site "dumb little man" www.dumblittleman.com . I feel the articles are good, small enough not to be boring but to some extent useful at least temporarily. Any better options any one?

This book I brought expecting a lot. But I am getting a feeling this is not an honest work. I had already read that it is biased and meant to condmn muslims. So not reading it. Another book was Somerset Maughm's short story collection. Again not reading. But what I finished and enjoyed reading was kannada monthly Mayura. Both short stories, poems and articles are good.

I started the day with an argument. What is new about that. Nothing. Well, let me rephrase it. As usual me and my spouse started the day with an argument - over love jihad. He complained - you were telling that in Mangalore they attack youngsters it they talk to a muslim boy or girl, now see what has been happening!! I answered I doubt its truthfulness and also for me this is not an important issue at all. I do not have any religion. So religion is immaterial to me. Converting a girl to muslim in the name of Religion is better than attacking them, or beating them etc according to me. Really, whether to believe in god, I am doubtful about. But religion, a big no no. May be religion is a protocol to interact with God . But the amount of violence and hatred which are its side effects are terrible. Come on, discard that protocol. think of some thing new which will bring the best in man. Nowadays  religion is becoming a way of bringing up and sanctifying all the hatred buried in hu...

My current maid servant is old. May be in her late fifties. (I do not feel like telling her anything even when she does not work properly. ) Where are your children I asked. They are staying separately. And I have to work and take care of my old man she said. Why don't you apply for old age pension I asked again. We tried but not able to get. We are not even getting the 10Rs /kg rice. I started my R&D. Googled for old age pension. The information I got was really breath taking. If you provide sufficient information about your destitution and your age is above 65, the kind Indian government will provide you the old age pension of full 75 rupees a month. Isn't it too generous of the government? What all you can buy with that money? 2 kgs of Rice?? Thank you India. You care for your citizens yes, senior citizens

In the training Institute where I am working , they conduct classes on Sundays also. So someone has to work on Sundays. It invariable comes to me. OK, I should leave the cozy feeling of getting up late on a sunday, spend the day with family members like arguing with husband and nagging son, go for shopping some stupid dress which I realise does not suit/fit/look good on me as soon I bring it home and take a beauty no no no beautiful nap in the afternoon for half an hour times 6. These things are something one looks forword to. But alas, my bosses do not realise that. They will always schedule a sunday class for me and ruin my week end and hence my week. Not only that, I am entitled a compensatory off for working on Sunday. It will not be on a fixed day. The day depends on the whim and fancy of DCM,CM. No no, not Yeddy, our deputy center manager or center manager. To get this , I have to mail, call and talk personally at least ten times. I am sick and tired of all this. So this week I s...

Does this happen to everyone or atleast anyone? I will be travelling to office. I see the backside of a vehicle and see payal written there. Then suddenly background music "payalawali dekhana..". What is wrong with that you may ask. Nothing I just wonder in my very very volatile RAM, how many songs are stored. And also, I am thinking something and not able to get suitable word. But again my background process supplies with most suitable (not so well known) word. Good. Again too many books which I read are not completely futile. Coming back to songs , I am very very fond of bollywood songs of good old old days. I got this site songs.pk from my son. Has a very good collection of songs both old and new. It took me a long time to realise that pk stands from pakistan. Started feeling guilty. Why should I download our own hindi songs from a pakistani site? In our office, in our room, every one is a fan of bollywood songs. A chubby boy from MP will be singing and listening to sad...

I am getting too much angry on spouse and son. Absence of maid servant may not be the only reason. I am seeing the futility of all these. Why do I work in a job where I am not happy, students are not happy, employer is not happy. What future holds for me. Work here till I re tyre? I know I love to learn than to teach. But I will not paid to learn. I can feel bearably ok , when I am teaching to smart kids. Smart kids will become oversmart after they feel they have learnt enough from me. But I work because TINA factor. How long? How to come out of this infinite loop. There is no ctrl C. Or will it cause kernel panic? So far I was just trying either alt-tab or ctrl z. exit I am not sure. But halt is only in the hands of superuser. Alas I am not that. Suppose I leave this job , I can stay at home. Go to my library once a week read books and clean and cook the rest of the time. (Have not I argued like this each time I had quit my job only to realise I wont clean and cook little. And will be...

Read two books, Onistha some French book and Something happened by Joseph Heller. First one is not good, I don't even remember now what the story was all about. But Something Happened is really too good. Of course again the theme, family is more relevant to me than some war story like catch-22. Anyway it is a good read. Again I try to compile the kernel, once everyday and fail. Not able to understand what is the problem. Anyway I have done it in office. My processor here is core-2. I tried giving core-2, 686, pentium pro. Nothing seems to work. What am I to do? I tried getting user mode linux and running it. That is also failing may be I do not have sufficient swap partition. If I write one good device driver.... I write it. That is about it. Have started feeling jealous about these kids, who learn and get better jobs. I do not have that prospect. I have to rot in this hell.

Read this book by Japanese author Yasunari kawabata, hope I spelled it right. Touched me. May be because it is about an old man (similar to my age group, almost.) And he is from upper middle class family. But his children are unhappy. Son is having an extramarital affair and daughter has left her husband and come home. He is not able to do much about both and hence suffering. We become helpless when our children are having problems and we are not able to do much about that. We feel guilty that may be somewhere the problem is caused by our fault in bringing them up. Was reading bits and pieces of Datu by s.l.Bhairappa. It is one great book. May be better than the above mentioned book. The character depiction is much stronger. When reading about Satya, you tend to feel proud. When about Srinivas, you tend to feel guilty as if he is your personification i.e. a man without will power.

Are you happy? Ask this question to hundred people. You may find very few affirmative answers. Why are we unhappy? All of us? Ask these people what makes them happy. You may expect different answers. Like a new mobile (my son is waiting for one after I spoilt the old one with water), a bigger house, a bigger car, a better job etc etc. Ask these same people after they get these things are they happy. Their list will include new objects of desire. But why am I writing this? Am I happy? Yes, as long as I am writing this. So my happiness lies in writing blogs which no one reads, no one knows it exists. But there are other things which make me happy also, like eating something really tasty, reading a very nice book, writing some program which noone has asked me to write etc. After 44 loong years and head full of grey hairs, I have atleast realised that material things do not make me happy. Read somewhere that good people are not necessarily happy, but only happy people can be good....

ಕಬೀರನ ದೋಹ ಗಳು ಎಂದು ಓದುತ್ತಿದ್ದೆ. ನಿಜವಾಗಿ ಬಹಳ ಸುಂದರ ಮತ್ತು ಅರ್ಥಗರ್ಭಿತವಾಗಿವೆ. http://www.boloji.ಕಂ/ ನಲ್ಲಿ ಇಂಗ್ಲಿಷ್ ಅನುವಾದದ ಜೊತೆಗೆ ಕೊಟ್ಟಿದ್ದಾರೆ. Odi . ನಮ್ಮ ಭಾರಥದಲ್ಲಿದ್ದಸ್ಟು ಸಾಹಿತ್ಯದ ಸಂಪತ್ತು ಬಹುಷಃ ಇಂಗ್ಲಿಷ್ನಲ್ಲಿ ಇರಲಿಕ್ಕಿಲ್ಲ. (??) I am loving it ಇನ್ನು ಕೆಲೆವು ಬಿನ್ಜಲಗಳಲ್ಲಿ (ವೆಬ್) ಹಿಂದಿ sms ಗಳು ತುಂಬ ತಮಾಷೆಯಾಗಿರುತ್ತವೆ. Why does this @#@#@# take so much of effort to type our own kannada here.? ಇದರಿಂದ ಕಲಿತ ಮೊರಲ್ ಎಂದರೆ ಇಡಿ ದಿನ ಬೇಡದೆ ಇರುವದನ್ನು ಗೂಗಲ್ ಮಾಡುವದರ ಬದಲು ಇಂತವುಗಳನ್ನು ಓದಿದರೆ ತಲೆ ಸ್ವಲ್ಪ ಸರಿಯಾಡಿತು. ತಪ್ಪು ತಿಳಿಯ ಬೇಡಿ ಸ್ವಾಮಿ. ನಾನು ನನ್ನ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಹೇಳುತ್ತಿದ್ದೇನೆ. ಒಂದರ ಭಾವಾನುವಾದ ನನ್ನ crude ಭಾಷೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ಹೇಳಲಾ. ಎಲೆ ಮನುಜ. ಓಡಬೇಡ. ಸಮಾಧಾನ ಚಿತ್ತನಾಗು. ತೋಟದ ಮಾಲಿಯು ಕೊಡಗಟ್ಟಲೆ ನೀರು ಸುರಿದರೇನು, ಗಿಡ ಕೂಡಲೇ ಹಣ್ಣು ಬಿಟ್ಟಿತೆ ಹ ಹ ನಮ್ಮಂತ ಭಾಷಾಂತರಕಾರರು ಎಲ್ಲೆವನ್ನು ಕೆಡಿಸಿಬಿಡುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಇನ್ನೊಂದು ಕಾರಣವೆಂದರೆ ಬಹುಶ ಕೆಲೆವು ಭಾಷೆಗಳ ಸೊಗಡು ನಮ್ಮ ಭಾಷೆಯಲ್ಲಿಲ್ಲವೇನೋ ? ಮತ್ತೆ ಬೈಯಬೇಡಿ.

ನಿನ್ನ ಕೆನ್ನೆಯ ಗುಳಿ ಚೆನ್ನ ನನ್ನ ಕೆನ್ನೆಯೋ ಎಲ್ಲ ಒಂದೇ ಗುಳಿ ನಿನ್ನಂತೆಯೇ ನನ್ನ ಬಾಯಲ್ಲೂ ಹಲ್ಲಿಗಿಂತ ಗುಲಿಗಳೇ ಹೆಚ್ಚಾದರೂ ನಿನ್ನಂತೆ ನನ್ನ ಬಾಯಿ ಮುದ್ದಲ್ಲ ಭಯಾನಕ ನಿನ್ನ ತೊದಲ ನುಡಿಗೆ ಮನೆಯೆಲ್ಲ ಸಂಭ್ರಮ ನನ್ನ ತೊದಲ ಕೇಳುವರಿಲ್ಲ ನಿನ್ನ ಅಳು ನಿಲಿಸಿಲು ಮನೆ ಮಂದಿಯದೆಲ್ಲ ಸರ್ಕಸ್ ನನ್ನ ಅಳು ಕಾಣದು ಯಾರಿಗೂ ನಿನ್ನ ಅಪ್ಪ ಅಮ್ಮನ ಪ್ರಾಣ ನೀನು ನನ್ನ ಅಪ್ಪ ಅಮ್ಮ , ಎಲ್ಲಿ ಆದರೂ ಬೇಡ ಮಗೂ ಈ ಎಲ್ಲ ಸುಖ ನಿನಗಿರಲಿ ನನಗಲ್ಲ

I opened around 16 windows of 16 different articles of Outlook india site. A habit I had cultivated prior to broadband era, when online time, not the amount of download was billed. One article which I found particularly interesting is about Urdu columnists in Pakistan, who write without verifying any facts and write all kinds of conspiracy theories blaming US, India and Isreal. And the article also says that, English versions of the same columns are saner and do not carry these lies. Is a similar thing happening to local language media and books in India? I take the example of a kannada book by S.L.Bhairappa where it seems he has explained the muslim plunders during Aurangzeb period, obviously exaggerating the facts. He is supposed to have quoted historical dates. So people think that these are all facts. And this gives them another reason to hate muslims. Do we need such writers and media at this time, when the world is already filled with so much violence. Isn't it a moral respo...

I have invented a new time pass when travelling. Reading the phrases written on vehicles especially autos. Well it is really entertaining. Amma i.e mother is the most famous word here followed by bull (gooli). The latter is normally pictorial. But some autos even say in words "gowdru gooli". Beware, this auto will stab you with its horns. Yesterday I saw the combination of both. A bull's picture above which Amma was written. Well, not only this person , even his mother will stab you. Many other people write their childrens' names and wives' names. Again some of them will be very weird. Like Sushmitha on one side and Pakshita on other side. Pakshita????I agree my eyesight is quite bad. But what else it could have been. Unable to guess. One auto had the most harsh truth written. Love is sweet and poijun. Don't we all know it is a poijun!!!! Many devout people, I think people on the wrong side of youth like me, will have god's name written. What names!! I ...

This year, so many people died. Two gentlemen from the neighbourhood, three of the neighbours from parents house and one class-mate. And none of these were aged or seriosly ill. Why? When does our body stop functioning and how and why? Who is in charge of these? Surely not us. We do not understand anything. A person who is talking with us today, is no more suddenly tomorrow. Why? It the body has to fail, won't it show any symptoms earlier? Or if it is all hard coded elsewhere, is there no meaning in us getting treatment? My class-mate. She is 44 years old like me. Why does she have to die at this age leaving behind a small son?

Currently I am trying to write a kind of simulator for ARM processor. So far I have written upto mov, add , branch and cmp instructions. I have taken care of barrel shifting. Well the simulator does not yet have a gui. I plan to put that at the end with either qt or kde. A fortnight ago I was reading and trying out the programs from device driver by rubini. Got stuck at usb drivers and block drivers. Did not know how to test those two. Well the idea is, if it is noted down somewhere, it might help me to come back to all these unfinished projects at a later date.

The major problems faced in Bangalore are roads, power and pollution. Can't we do anything about them. For example all plastics can be collected and mixed for road tarring. Every area can have a collection bin, where citizens can dump their plastic waste. Similarly the kitchen waste and other bio-degradable waste collected in each area can be used to produce cooking gas and sold to restaurants and manure can be sold to farmers. Or if feasible, it can be used to produce electricity. That will solve all the three problems. If anybody has any idea, what I can do at home about atleast my plastic waste, and kitchen waste, please post comments.

I did not like the book at all. May be it is outdated. Or may be I should not have read the review before reading the book. When there are science fiction which are much more advanced than this, this looks too dull.

I am also happy about Delhi HC decision about gay rights though I don't belong to that community. My reasons are different though. May be a married life with a woman might be better because I feel that I can always talk to a woman and make her understand than a man. We have a book and hundred of jokes regarding difference between men and women. And most of the times when two women are talking, they will be critisizing men(Age, you say?) and I feel vice-versa is also true. So if we are so different from one another , why marry and then lead a life filled with conflicts (fights). If a woman marries another, they will think similarly. If not atleast they can understand the other's viewpoint. And when a man marries another man, they can be as rude as they wish with each other and be happy still. But for me, it is not possible in this lifetime. One, I have reached date of expiry . Two, my husband is too good looking, to leave. Mind it, I did not say good! On second thoughts, does ...

I have a garden. Not well maintained. Not at all maintained. But yes, it has flowers of all colors. Like the purple hibiscus, yellow flower, whitish rose, red hibiscus, blue and white shankhapushpas and jasmines. I water these only once in a while. Rain will also do the same. Some of them are not even planted by me. Seeds were carried by wind and the plants have grown. Is it his way of showing me how we should do our karma no matter what.

I will not eat any supper today. Ahaa, finally I realised that I badly need to diet. Are you saying that? Not a chance. So what if I am growing like the contents of my desktop. As the cliche goes, I am in shape. Round is also a shape. And who bothers about little bit of overweight. All my childhood and teenage I was underweight. Shouldn't I compensate for that now. Let me tell you a secret. Still my pauch is smaller than husband's. He religiously walks for half an hour a day and is not at all a eatoholic like me. Ha ha. Let us if I overtake him then I will start reconsidering my position. Ok, the topic was why I do not want to eat my supper. Well just now I ate a malagoa mango. Ah! That is happiness. May be there is no other thing as delicious as a mango. Not even chocolate. After eating that should I eat RICE? Impossible! It is like drinking aquaguard water after drinking nectar. So have I just discovered the secret of eternal bliss?

Why AM I here? I was supposed to be building the kernel image of latest Linux OS. OK, ok now I remember I tried it and the kernel paniked (just like me). So I am here. Really what will I do with this new kernel you ask me? TINA. Because the current kernel which I am having has been de-moused. By me of course. I don't know what I did. But now the mouse does not move. Or to be precise, mouse moves but the arrow on the screen is stationary. 22-June I was unable to post this earlier. So now I can proudly say that I have done it. No not compiled the kernel. But installed the kernel. And I DID NOT format the windows partition (Hence saved my marriage. Otherwise mine would have been a unique case where a man divorces his wife for formatting his files :-) ) Now I am able to used net , mouse and everything else on Linux as well. No, not as well, as you can see all my blogs have been saved as drafts instead of being posted. Did I give too less value for swap partition?

I am reading a book -Laughter .. by Milan kundera. First I took the book (borrowed from library) because it had the magic word laughter in it. Then also because I thought the author is Indian. Both the counts I was wrong. It is neither humourous nor is the author Indian from any angle. But the book is really worth reading. It is semi fictional semi autobiographical. Reading the book made me realise how lucky we are to be living in a democratic country not without much trouble. How will the individuals develop if the existence itself is under threat? Thank you Gandhi tata. For making us the citizens of a free country. How will the people live in countries like Afghanistan or Isreal where every day begins with a terror and ends with a sigh and again fear of facing the next day? Who is responsible for such situations ? What if there is any, is the solution? And one more thought . How will it feel to be running away from our country and stay in a foreign land, knowing too well that we wi...

I plucked some leaves from my kitchen garden for (cooking) making tambuli in the evening. Imagine, I who can not read small letters, even in broad daylight, plucked some dodda patre leaves in the dark kitchen garden. I tried dry roasting them with coriander leaves. Suddenly I saw something whitish. A worm? What sin I was about to commit? I was about to feed non-veg, that too a worm, to two pious brahmins. Threw out the whole thing. Should I wear glasses even when I am cooking? I hate these chalis. So never wear them. It hurts my nose. I go to a super market. I read a box of something to buy. I can not read its price. I ask the sales boy/girl, what is the price. They will think that I am illiterate. But see, I can't help it. Can't these people print atleast prices in large print for forty plus people. After a long time today, I tried reading my daily horoscope from newspaper. Could not read anything. At this exponential decay rate, the day is not far when my vision would be ze...

I see this board every day - Divya drashti kannina aspatre - which translates to . I do not know the word for Divya. It is something like what Sanjaya got and saw the Mahabharath and described each event the Dhritharashtra( one doubt here God could have given this vision to Dhritharashtra himself ??) So I wonder if everyone who goes to this hospital gets a Divya vision. Shall I go there and get at least my pre-chalis vision?

This year has been Jasmine year. Since February end jasmines are blooming and shining like stars in the terrace. How many varieties, dundu mallige, sooji mallige, bhatkala mallige and a little bit of kasturi mallige. It is as if they are telling me don't keep grumbling about life. Look at us and learn. Pity I can not capture their fragrance in camera (my poor little scratched mobile which is fm radio for me and sms machine for son). The fragrance and the way they take us to an altogether different world. If you think, how many different shapes of jasmines, how many different fragrances and each one uniquely tremendously whatever you call wonderful. O God you are great!!! But let me not forget my other better(bitter) half who built this house where I can plant these creepers. Who waters these every day. It is like - I asked him for a flower, he built a house where I can grow as many flowers as I want ( and can?) Now do not ask me what do I do with these flowers. I do not put it in m...

Every night after everyone else have released the control over tv remote, for five-ten minutes I do channel surfing and I see the same thing. doubleu doubleu doubleu godshop.com. Then I wonder what we may get in these shops? Some compassion, love for human beings, some good nature. I would like to send some people to this shop. So many of them. Osama bin Laden( wo to gaya), leaders of many nations, and all other religious fanatics. I hope that these people learn some lessons there which even a little baby knows. That the lesson is " IT IS WRONG TO HURT OTHERS "  no matter what. That there are no different gods for different people but there is only one god. That if a person does not agree with your point of view, or your Gods, YOU CAN NOT PUNISH HIM. That god will never hurt, he will only love each and everyone. So  YOU SHOULD ALSO DO THE SAME. That an eye for an eye will make the whole world blind. I know, I know, I am unable to think and write clearly, leav...

I was driving in the same old road with the same old people on the road. Suddenly I saw a Writing on a vehicle "God is just behind you". Hey, what did I do this time? Two days back I have paid 100 bucks for crossing a red signal. But so far on the road no signals were present. Did they come to know that still I haven't done my scooty's emission test. Then a sober voice said, it is not police, not traffic police. Only god. Godaaa, that's okay. No need to worry. He will forgive me for any of my sins. Even if we do not have the practice of asking for mercy on one day after committing all kinds of not so good things throughout the week. Our god knows, I am not responsible for any of my actions but my karma is. Anyway I got relieved and did not turn back, but looked in the rear view mirror. No I could see no one who remotely looked like omnipotent GOD. How did I know who was god. I knew better than to expect him to come with all crown and beads and silk as in a TV ser...

How is that possible? Me saying bye to books. The reason is this. (Or is it thus ?)Because the book I am reading is a Herman Hesse and I can not read it after a tired day and nor can I start another book unless I finish that. Of course it is rented. And in the most inexpensive library also the fine on the book might have neared the original price. So since I can not read, I munch (no,no, not the books) and watch World movies. Movies like nikita, two sisters etc. Nikita made me realise that, I adore women who are not feminine, who are confident, who are dare devils. Is it because I am anything but confident? But like them, I do not pay much attention to dressing, but look terrible unlike them. I dye once in a blue moon. So most of the time my hair is greyish with some blackicsh brown sprayed here and there. I do not regularly iron the dresses. And I go shopping for clothes around 15 kms ( If you know bangalore, you will realise how difficult it is to drive 15 kms here. To my husband. ;...

Why is it that the German authors write so intensely. Gunter grass now this Herman Hesse. His book magister ludi is GREAT!! But I have not yet finished the book. Read one maughm which is strangely about miracles and is strangely not tragic. But a good read. THe book is Catalina. It is about a lame girl who gets her legs back by miracle. Well it is not as touching because it is not tragic. But what I finished just now is, Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo. I am half sure I have not spelled his name right. The book is about dreams and visions etc. Style is somewhat Richard Bachish. But a great book. For once, I am happy that I bought this book.

Atleast my one search must be over. No no I am not talking about searching my vehicle key before starting to office or searching for my son or husband's banian in the storage bin which was once a ward robe. No it is not at all a trivial search like this. It is high funda, spiritual search more suitable to my age (my 43 is the age for spirituality. Not yet you say..? THanks.) I have found the almighty omnipresent God. No, no he did not break the column and come out roaring like Narasimha. In fact I have not seen him yet. But I know who he is or she is? 3 days back I saw on the backside of a truck. " Pradeep . tayiyee devaru". Translated into English it says " Pradeep mother is god". So there is one particular Pradeep whose mother is God. Now don't be foolish again and ask me Hindu God or musalman god. There is only one god or should we say Goddess. THat is mother of Pradeep. Now you will tell me there might be 1000s of Pradeeps in this namma Bengaluru. How ...

Today I argued with my family members - husband and parents about why I hate Modi. Two days back I wanted to talk in my office function about religious hatred. But did not. And now I came across a blogger Indian Homemaker who has explained why she hates BJP. Like her , even I clearly remember the days when there was no religious divide in small towns, no religious violence in southern states. So don't you see who is responsible for this divide and rule. These people gained enough votes with hate propaganda against muslims. Now they have started against christians. If they believe that conversion is crime, crime enough to burn the churches and people, then what about the conversion of party these politicians do with no other motive than sticking to power. Why don't these hindutva brigade burn the politicians who have converted to BJP recently. India is a secular country. Every citizen has a right to practice any religion he wishes or not to practice any religion at all. Who are...